StinkyLemsky: A Child of the 80s Grows Up

A Wedding Story – Part 13: Break out the Shot Glasses!

Prior Wedding Story posts can be found here.

There comes a time in every girl's life when she is allowed, for just a few hours, to party like a rock star while wearing a shirt that says, “Buy me a shot, I’m tying the knot!”

My bachelorette party was a weekend-long extravaganza, organized by Katie. Let’s just say that Friday night was party night…

Then, after two amazing spa treatments and a delicious lunch on Saturday, we went out on the town. The feather boa is a tradition in our family and let me tell you, it was fun to wear! Oh, and another tradition...

Tequila shots. Top shelf – thanks mom! The bar was pretty quiet when we got there (not a soul on the dance floor), but it didn’t take us too long to get the party started…

There’s nothing quite like a game of limbo to get people rockin' ...

Once we got back to the condo, things really got interesting. Katie and I had devised an ingenius method of assigning bridesmaids to groomsman - we had a groomsman draft!! Earlier that week, I had made bios for each groomsman, complete with pictures and fun facts.

The process of deciding which bridesmaid would get first "draft pick" was hilarious. We invented an obstacle course, and, well… see for yourself.

 

I’ve never laughed so hard in my entire life; it was so much fun to have a good old fashioned slumber party! The next day, as we packed up and headed home, I knew my wedding day was just around the corner...

A Wedding Story – Part 12: I’ll get to the wedding eventually…

Prior Wedding Story posts can be found here.

I know it’s taking me forever to get the actual wedding part of our Wedding Story, and I apologize. But I didn’t have a blog last year (darn it, past-Becky, what were you thinking?) And I’ve got future-Becky sitting on my shoulder telling me that these memories (even though they seem so vivid now) will fade with time and I should record them before it’s too late. So basically, thanks to that pesky future-Becky, you’re stuck with pre-wedding posts for a little bit longer.

Now, where were we? Oh yes, it was down to the wire with less than a week remaining before the big day. But there are a few (really important) events that I still need to tell you about. First of all, I was simultaneously really excited and really nervous about my St. Louis wedding shower. Katie had flown in especially for the occasion, along with her mom, Sharon, also known as my favorite mother-in-law. Here we are before leaving the house:

 

Well hello there lovely ladies! Can you tell I'm nervous?

My mom and sisters had been at the restaurant getting things set up and making sure that lunch would be ready for us. A little background on the location... it's an old pub that used to be one of my dad's favorite places. They have a back room that's just the perfect size for groups and we've had several showers and parties there! Of course, as soon as I arrived we needed a group shot:

From left: My mom, Debbie (you can call her Deb), Beth (also known as the ‘younger middle child’), Me, Susan (my older sister & also known as ‘she who makes the cutest children on the planet’), and Ellen (the baby of the family, also known as ‘the favorite red-head’). Yes, we’re all sisters. No, we don’t look alike.

One of my favorite details about the shower were the delicious petite fours, complete with monogram, displayed on a cake stand with red roses:

 

There were a lot of gifts to plow through, so I started opening them immediately. Being the center of attention while trying to look incredibly excited about gifts that you're not entirely surprised about can be a challenge. Luckily for me, I had decided that I would NOT stalk my registry at all. Not even ONCE, so that helped make things a little more exciting. Check out the cute wrapping job on this gift:

 

And then... Oh no! Run for your lives! It’s the choke!!

After I finished opening gifts and thanking everyone profusely, Mitch showed up to help haul everything to the house. My sisters cornered him and made him open his present… beef jerkey and a shark oven mitt! (The two items he wanted to register for). He also wanted to add a "monster shaped pumpkin scooper" to the registry, but I had to draw the line somewhere. Boys.

Finally, we got one last shot of the happy couple before it was time to head home.

Next week, I'll share pictures from my Ohio shower and the Bachelor/ette parties. Oh, and the wedding... well, it was absolutely magical! We'll get there eventually...

A Wedding Story – Part 11: It’s all in the Details

Prior Wedding Story posts can be found here.

My dress had been purchased, our “Save the Date” cards had been mailed, and Mitch and I had moved into our new home. As the last weeks leading up to the wedding started winding down, I knew it would take a lot of work to pull our plans together before December 15^th.

First on the agenda was mailing the invitations. Mitch and I had every single invitation stuffed, hand-addressed, stamped, and sealed (complete with hand-engraved return addresses) before we moved. That was a huge time saver because we just needed to drop them in the mailbox when the time came.

Next, we focused on the “DIY” projects. Our favors, Christmas ornaments with personalized ribbons, needed to be put into their boxes with a table number affixed. It was time to call in reinforcements.

One of the trickiest projects was our programs. I designed and printed them, using a template I had found online, and rounded the corners easily enough. Next, I needed to find a way to include a vigil candle with each program (which would be lit during a soloist performance of Silent Night during the ceremony).

                Would you believe that it’s darn near impossible to find 20 spools of the same basic red ribbon during Christmas time? In an effort to save money, I had purchased the first 3 spools at Wal-Mart, thus sparking a cross-state ribbon hunt. (My younger sister, Beth, came to the rescue and brought seven spools back from Springfield on her way home from college for winter break).

Before I knew it, we were only four weeks away from the big day, and that meant it was time to tend to legal matters.

The day we went to the courthouse to pick up our license, it really hit me: I was getting married. I remember sitting down with the assistant and answering the basic questions (legal name, SSN, etc) and whether I had ever been married before. I turned to Mitch and said, “No, I haven’t – can you imagine if this was the first time you found out that I had?!” It was a good thing neither one of us had any skeletons in the closet!

In the last few weeks we had so many projects going on! We made our own centerpieces and table numbers (framed pictures of Buckeye players – their jerseys were the numbers). Put ribbon on the unity candle (I didn’t see the need to buy a pre-made one). Found some chocolate Buckeyes for the cake table (my mother-in-law came to the rescue, bringing them in from Ohio)! Next, I had bridal party gifts to box and wrap, ceremony music to pick for the string quartet, and final dress fittings to attend. Oh, and did I mention I was gearing up for my final exams as well?

There was still plenty to do the week of the wedding. One of our last projects was assembling a gift for our out-of-town guests, who had booked almost forty rooms in the hotel adjoining our reception venue. I thought it would be fun to put together beer buckets! Each bucket contained: a guide to St. Louis, 2 bottles of water, 2 bottles of beer, 2 bags of chips, 2 candy canes, 2 packets of hot chocolate, one welcome letter, and a chocolate sucker in the shape of the St. Louis Arch!

With so much going on you’d think I’d be a nervous wreck… but I really wasn’t. Oh sure, there were miniature crisis moments, and I was definitely stressed about getting everything done – but I had the best friends and family in the world keeping me sane.

They had been there for me every step of the way…

A Wedding Story – Part 10: Let the Planning Begin!

In my last wedding story post, Mitch had surprised me with an engagement party on New Year’s Eve. Now, before I get to the story of our wedding day, I thought I’d write a few posts about the year we were engaged – and the wedding planning process.

Mitch and I decided almost immediately that we would have a winter wedding in St. Louis. It seemed appropriate, considering the fact that we first started dating at Christmas time and just loved the holiday season. His family would be traveling from Ohio for the festivities; so we knew we’d have to pick a date right away in order to spread the word. And what’s the best way to let people know that you’ve picked a date? Why STDs of course.

NO – silly. Not those STDs. The wedding STDs, aka “Save The Dates.”

Then, as every bride knows, it’s time to go dress shopping. Stat. It can take several months for a dress to be shipped once it’s ordered & most people recommend that you start shopping for dresses about 9 months prior to your wedding.

So, I shopped.

While none of these dresses made the final cut, (I’ll reveal my dress when I post photos from the wedding day); it was really fun to try them all on. I especially loved the different veils – I was actually starting to feel like a bride!

The next step for Mitch and I was a huge one – we bought a house! Yes, that’s right, we were house hunting, planning a wedding, and studying (me for my MBA classes, Mitch for his CFP exam) all at the same time. Life was crazy, hectic, stressful, but also so fun.

The wedding was just a few months away and our plans were starting to come together. With the help and advice of my sisters (and, future sister-in-law Katie) all the little details were finalized. And there were a LOT of details...

A Wedding Story, Part 9: The Rest

There I was, ice skating in Forest Park with my brand new fiancé. The proposal had been just perfect – I couldn’t have been more surprised. I’m pretty sure I only made it around the rink a few times because I just couldn’t focus on skating!

We decided to head back to the apartment because Mitch told me that I would probably want to change my clothes for dinner. (Once again, I thanked the fates that I had decided to shower earlier in the day!)

Can you guess where our dinner reservation was?

That’s right… the same restaurant where Mitch had first decided that someday, he was going to kiss me.

I remember sitting at our table and not being able to stop smiling, I was just so happy. My ring was sparkling in the candlelight and I couldn’t believe how beautiful it was. The woman at the table next to us caught my eye and smiled when I got up to use the restroom, I think that she could tell we were newly engaged.

After dessert, I knew we needed to get going. We had plans to go to my friend’s New Year’s Eve party that night and I couldn’t wait to tell everyone our big news. We just had to stop by the apartment one last time to pick up the camera - that’s when I got my last surprise.

We were walking to the back door of my apartment building when I looked to my left and thought that I recognized someone in the apartment lounge. Suddenly, it dawned on me.

“Mitch, is that your grandma?!”

He smiled at me and nodded as he steered me towards the lounge door. It turns out that (back in September) he had reserved the room and planned a surprise engagement party for me! I was in total shock as we walked in the door; I thought that if Mitch’s grandma was there, then surely… and then I saw her – Katie was there too! She had never even gone home to Ohio!

Then I realized that everyone was there – my friends, Mitch’s friends, both of our families! My sisters and mom had even helped set up the party after they left the skating rink... I couldn’t believe that Mitch had coordinated this entire day of surprises for me and I had been completely clueless.

As 2006 turned into 2007, I was surrounded by my closest friends and family. But most importantly, I was with Mitch. I knew that I would never again have to dread the New Year’s countdown because Mitch would be there. First as my fiancée, and then as my husband. I would forever have someone to kiss.

And, really, what more could a girl ask for?

   

A Wedding Story, Part 8: The proposal

Catch up with parts 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 7

Mitch proposed to me on New Years Eve of 2006 and he had everything planned out to the smallest detail. He picked that day because it was his grandparents’ anniversary (who had been married on that day more than fifty years ago). He picked the location, the Steinberg ice skating rink in Forest Park, for a couple of reasons. First of all, the park has always been one of my favorite areas of St. Louis. The World’s Fair was held there in 1904 and today there are several museums, a running trail, and even the St. Louis Zoo on the fairgrounds. Secondly, my older sister got engaged in front of the St. Louis History museum, which is in Forest Park, so the venue has ties to my own family history.

Mitch knew that I would get suspicious if he asked me to go ice skating because we had been talking about going for months, so he had my younger sister invite me. I didn’t suspect a thing and was excited to call Mitch and tell him that we finally had a reason to head downtown and check out that skating rink! I couldn’t wait to see the park decorated for the holidays and maybe get some hot chocolate too!

That day was not exactly ideal for outdoor activities. It had been raining all morning and everyone was nervous that we’d have to cancel our outing. In fact, they were a little overly nervous in my opinion, I didn’t really see what the big deal was (at this point, my whole family was in on the plan). We debated about a few other locations – I suggested we could even go to the Science Center or the Art Museum – but we were all really hoping the weather would clear up.

About an hour before we were supposed to meet, it finally stopped raining! I decided to hop in the shower because it looked like our plans were actually going to go through. My family picked us up at my apartment and we rode together to the park, which was only about a block away from where I lived at the time. I remember bickering with my older sister because she wanted to follow her GPS system instead of listening to me - even though I knew how to get to the rink. She was adamant though, and ended up parking a little further away than I thought was necessary.

I think it’s obvious that I literally had no clue that this was going to be the day! We got out of the car and started walking towards the rink when Mitch said, “hey, let’s go over here for a walk.” I started to protest when I suddenly realized what was happening. I turned around to look at my mom and sisters and they had three cameras pointed at us!! I looked at Mitch in shock and couldn't believe this was actually happening.

Then, he got down on one knee and said some incredibly romantic things about how much he loved me and how he had been waiting quite some time to ask me a question...

"Will you marry me?"

It was like my heart stood still and I was so totally shocked and elated and so completely in love... Of course I said YES! Then he stood up and we kissed each other and hugged for what seemed like forever before I had a chance to even process what had happened. I looked down at my left hand, which was shaking, and couldn’t believe that I was wearing an engagement ring! It was so incredibly beautiful - more beautiful than anything I could have ever picked out for myself.

We walked over to my family and I gave everyone a big hug and knew immediately that I had to call Katie (she was in Ohio for Christmas break). Right when she answered the phone, I said, “Katie… we’re engaged!” and she was so excited and said congratulations, and she was crying and I was crying and then my phone battery died! We walked to the skating rink as I scrambled to call her back and then make phone calls to my grandmother and a few friends.

I remember thinking, “How on earth am I supposed to go ice skating at a time like this?! I can barely walk I’m so excited!” Mitch had to put my skates on for me because I was shaking with happiness and couldn’t focus on lacing them up. I remember thinking how I was really glad that I had decided to take a shower earlier! How embarrassing would it be to get a proposal if I was in my normal weekend attire of sweatpants and a hooded sweatshirt?!

Not to mention the fact that the three cameras caught one of the most romantic moments of my life…

As we skated around the rink, I was oblivious to the fact that there were more surprises in store…

To be continued.

A Wedding Story, Part 7: Still not engaged

Scroll down to start with Part 1 if you need to catch up

Christmas came and went (with ample proposal opportunities, might I add) and the question still hadn’t been ‘popped.’ There were a few nights when I thought for sure he was going to ask me. He had surprised me one night by booking a horse carriage ride through a Christmas light display after a romantic dinner. All night I kept wondering if maybe this was it.

Nope. I was completely stumped.

We had started dating at Christmas time, we both loved Christmas, and we had even watched a Christmas movie on our first date. Christmas time would be the perfect time to get engaged because it would give us the chance to tell both families (who live in separate states) in person.

But there we were, in the airport on our way home from Ohio the day after Christmas, and still no proposal. The magic of the holiday had ended and the airport stores were already taking down their Christmas decorations. I was feeling a little post-Christmas sadness and I started to second guess myself… maybe he didn’t really want to marry me. Was I imagining things? Things were going as perfectly as always, why hadn’t he asked me?

Basically, I was being a girl about things.

I decided to bring up the topic of marriage with him… I just wanted to know if he had a plan or not, whether or not we were going to be moving in that direction. Whether or not we were still on the same page. His answer, “No, honestly, I don’t have a plan right now.”

Ouch! That one hurt. Mitch didn’t even have a plan to propose to me. He’s like the king of all planners, Mr. Spreadsheet himself, Mr. Goal Setter extraordinaire. And he didn’t even have a plan?

It was definitely one of my lower moments. My eyes started to water and I couldn’t believe that he had just said that. What if he wanted to break up with me? We had just spent our first Christmas together, I was deeply in love with him, we had talked about marriage many times, and he didn’t even have a plan?

The next day I talked to my sisters & mom about the situation. How we had gotten into a fight at the airport and I had almost started crying and how we had made up over a couple of beers in the airport lounge. How I wasn’t sure where our relationship was heading because he didn’t even have a plan.

I don’t know how they put up with me. You see, they all knew that he had a plan… not only that, but that he had been making plans for months now (ever since September!).

If only I knew what he had in store for me…

To Be Continued

A Wedding Story, Part 6: No longer a secret

You see, Mitch couldn't contain his excitement and had spilled the beans on Christmas day in the car on the way to their grandma’s house. He told his family that he was dating me… In fact, that he had been with me Tuesday night, Wednesday night, and Thursday night (his dad high-fived him from the front seat after hearing that we went on three dates in a row).

Katie was taking the ostrich approach and burying her head in the sand until she could talk to me. Why hadn’t I called her to explain? Why was I so silent on the matter? What if Mitch only thought that I liked him, but really I was just spending time with him as friends?

Um yeah, kissing friends, but whatever. She didn’t know what the heck was going on.

So, on her drive home to St. Louis, she couldn’t take it anymore and she called me. I remember exactly where I was… at the mall looking at the post-Christmas sales. My phone rang, I looked at the caller ID, and I panicked.

“Hi Katie… How was your Christmas?”
“Oh, good thanks, how was yours?”

... ... ... ...

“Um, well. I’m kind of dating your brother…” and then I spilled the details. How I had kissed him that night at the bar, how I was sorry I hadn’t listened to her, but that I really did like him, I wasn’t just hanging around him as friends, and I had legitimate feelings for him. Oh, and that small matter of having been on three dates with him already.

And, you know what, she was totally okay with it! Well, I mean, I think that she was a little confused and maybe a little freaked out (I learned later that she had told her mom, “I don’t want to hear a word about it until there’s a ring on her finger!”) because she did NOT want to have to kick my hiney if I hurt her brother. But, she was understanding and genuinely happy and relieved that I really liked him too.

So, with that hurdle out of the way, we were free to date without reservations. I tried to make an effort to spend time with both of them separately, so that Katie wouldn’t feel left out. And I’m not going to lie, there were some awkward moments at first when Katie was at home (in her room with the door shut) and Mitch and I were on a date in the living room, but over time we worked those issues out & everyone started to feel more comfortable about the situation.

What can I say about that first year? (If this were a movie, this would probably be the part where you’d see those months of dating wrapped up in a tidy montage…) We loved spending time together, even if it was just to grill up some dinner and watch a movie. Oh, and I got to meet Mitch's parents again, this time as his girlfriend instead of as Katie's friend!

Things were great, but when I was traveling for work I missed Mitch terribly and couldn’t talk to him on a regular basis. I remember spending 25 days on a yacht off the coast of Costa Rica where I only had internet access three days out of the week. I actually paid the $7.00 fee to send him a telegram once or twice, just because I missed him so much. And whenever I got to a port that had internet cafés I would head straight to the computers and start checking my email. (On dial-up connections, now that is true love!)

He wrote me almost every day – even though he knew I could only write back occasionally. He wanted to keep in touch; that’s just the kind of guy he is. For the first time in a long time, I was really really happy in a relationship. Everything was great and after only a few months together, we were falling in love.

Later that year I finally found a job that didn’t require travel & would even allow me the chance to get my MBA in the evenings. I was set – things were falling into place. Mitch and I were beginning to talk seriously about marriage, and I shocked Katie one afternoon by telling her that he was saving for a ring. She was ecstatic!

Mitch and I were planning our lives together and I knew that he was going to pop the question soon. I just didn’t know when.

But I thought for sure it would be over Christmas break...

To be continued…

A Wedding Story: Part 5, Our first date

Catch up with parts 1, 2, 3, and 4.

To my immense relief, he did answer the phone! I pretended to be confident even though I was incredibly nervous and we decided that we would grab dinner Tuesday night and I’d bring over a movie, Miracle on 34^th Street, which he had never seen.

I got more and more nervous as Tuesday drew near. I knew one thing for sure – my friendships with both Mitch and Katie were on the line. I could absolutely not afford to screw this one up. I also had the feeling that I had set a chain of events in motion when I'd kissed him… there was no turning back now! With frayed nerves and the type of excitement that can only accompany a first date, I started the car and headed to his place.

When he opened the door, looking as handsome as ever, I gave him a quick hug and a kiss… Yes, I kissed him right off the bat! I didn't want to spend the whole night stressing out over whether or not we were going to kiss; so I kissed him. And right at that moment all of the emotions from the night at the bar washed over me…

Definitely a successful strategy… I recommend it wholeheartedly. It was amazing just how right everything felt; just like this was totally and completely normal – me kissing Mitch, us going on a date, everything.

At dinner, conversation flowed easily and neither of us could stop smiling. When we snuggled up to watch the movie it felt like we had been dating for months. It was totally natural, comfortable, and exciting all at the same time. For the rest of the week, we spent every evening just hanging out together. All of my worrying about a lack of chemistry was unnecessary. No… chemistry wasn’t a problem. The problem was how I was going to talk to Katie about things because this definitely couldn’t be excused as some crush brought on by beer goggles!

Before Mitch headed home to Ohio for the weekend, he agreed to give me time to tell Katie in person, after Christmas, so I had about a week to figure out what I was going to say.

Even though we had only been dating less than a week, I still missed Mitch over the holidays. I knew that he was thinking of me too when I woke up on Christmas morning and saw that he had sent me a text message “Merry Christmas Becky, I hope Santa brought you everything you wanted!”  I was so happy, everything was just perfect… I only had to wait two more days until Katie came home to tell her I was dating her brother and then we wouldn’t be keeping a secret anymore.

Little did I know, she already knew.

To be continued…

A Wedding Story, Part 4: The morning after

Did you miss the beginning of the story? Catch up with parts 1, 2, and 3.

Oh yes, he kissed me.

He kissed me like he meant it. As the song says, “He kissed me in a way that I’ve never been kissed before.” He kissed me like he had been waiting quite some time to do so. We talked, and kissed, and talked some more for what felt like hours (both giddy from the situation) before I snuck into Katie’s room for the night.

The next morning, I woke up with one thought in my mind...

Oh CRAP.

Crap.

What have I DONE?!

I was suddenly questioning everything that had happened the night before. Was I too brazen? What was I thinking? What if Mitch was totally embarrassed and didn’t want to be around me any more? What if I had ruined my friendship with Katie?

Slowly, cautiously, I rolled out of Katie’s bed and freshened up, brushing my teeth and grimacing from my hangover. Then I decided to face the music and head into the main room where Katie and Mitch were watching tv.

I looked out and, as tentatively as a field mouse, said “good morning”.

Silence.

Oh crap.

I retreated back into the bedroom, mind reeling. “I can’t believe they didn’t even say good morning. Katie must be furious. Mitch is embarrassed, he probably feels attacked. How could I just pounce on him like that?!” Then, I started thinking more rationally. “Wait a minute, this is ridiculous! I know I didn’t imagine that chemistry…”

After a few minutes of high-anxiety-fretting, I knew I had to face them again. I walked back into the living room, cleared my throat, and, a little more loudly this time, said “Good Morning.” They both turned to me and smiled, saying good morning in response. Crisis Averted!

(I later learned that they hadn’t heard me the first time, hence my momentary panic).

So, I felt better now, but I still wasn’t sure where things stood. I wondered if Mitch had said anything to Katie, whether Katie remembered that I had told her I liked her brother, and whether or not I could make a fast escape without being too obvious.

Where did I stand with Mitch? Did he like me? How was I going to be able to talk to him alone without Katie getting suspicious? I decided to play it by ear and after packing up my things the stars aligned and I had a moment alone with him.

Mitch was lying on the couch, watching tv, and I touched his hand gently and asked if it would be okay if I called him later that week. He said, “sure” (he never has been a man of many words) and then I said goodbye and walked out the door.

On the drive home, I replayed every moment. Could I have imagined the chemistry between us? Surely he had enjoyed that kiss… Oh my, that kiss. My heart started to do flip flops as I replayed the previous night in my mind & debated my options.

Katie was heading home to Ohio that evening for Christmas break and Mitch would be home alone for almost a week. If there was ever a time to make a move, this was it. I’d be able to go on a date with him (presuming he wanted to of course!) and see if there was any chemistry when it was just the two of us… no alcohol involved.

In fact, Katie didn’t even need to know about it. If we went on a few dates and things didn’t work out, we could just amicably part ways and still remain friends. There wouldn’t be as much weirdness if Katie didn’t know in the first place.

So I had a plan; and two days later I called him to see if he wanted to go on a date. As the phone started to ring, my insides were churning. Would he want to see me again? Was I doing the right thing? Would he be okay with keeping things secret from Katie for a few days?

Would he answer the phone?

To be continued